Totally...!

B.O. No Mo

Lately the stench that has been coming from my arm pits makes me wonder if I have male sweat glands. It was so bad the other night while I was working that I was afraid to get too close to customers. I was mortified and totally stuck without being able to add more D.O. for my B.O. Am I one of those people that will have to get a prescription for my deodorant? Love, Ruby

*ouch*

I ran out of toilet paper, and used a lemon wetnap to wipe. It really stings. Don't do this at home. owwwwwe!

uggg

How come when you have a pelvic exam at the gyno's office I swear their entire arm is up there?? I'm telling you I got my tonsils checked! What's up with that? AND then it makes me wonder... what makes a person ever want to be a gyno really?? Who likes doing that?? BUT I guess there is also those people who check prostates too - that sounds like loads of fun. Would you believe over the weekend I saw this big RV that was giving FREE prostate exams (yes I looked for the one for women but no luck) and there were ACTUALLY men sitting there filling the paperwork out. Could it be that they just saw the word FREE and never bothered to read the rest of the sign? There weren't even any women sitting there with guns to these men's heads MAKING them do it. STRANGE... I couldnt' resist a picture. Did you know that if you google prostate exam you will find a real live man getting a real live exam?? Ahhh Internet you never cease to amaze me!

ick.

If I didn't just finish my period, I'd question If I'm pregnant... I've felt really off lately... but I think its just a weird cold. But then whats this discharge from?

Have I mentioned my pee smells like cheerios & popcorn...?

it does.

-Gross Jenny

Great news!

My boobs are getting bigger. I wonder if they'll stick around??? All I want is to be a C, you know, for CUTE! - Love Ruby

Root a toot toot

While sitting at my IN LAWS house the other night I let a BIG ONE rip on their leather couch (which we all know is much worse than on a cloth couch). Total accident - would have NEVER done that on purpose. So I move my leg around TRYING desperately to make a noise with my leg but with no luck - THEN to my horror it smells. Please shoot me now and YES my mother and father in law were sitting RIGHT next time.... just let me die!! Love Ruby

(added) heres mine...
One time, when I was "holding it in", my brother picked me up over his shoulder and carried me up the stairs. I was yelling "Brother, put me down! PUT ME DOWN!! Put me---" fllllllp! (Right in my brothers face, PAY BACK!) My head flops down in humiliation...my new boyfriend was in the down wind, behind us on the stairs. I fought back tears!
Love Jenny :)

10 second rule?

I was just heating up my lunch (chinese food leftovers!!) and dropped a piece of Honey Garlic Breaded Veal on the floor... at work! (this stuff is like candy-meat) If it's sticky, does the 10 second rule still count? I washed it... and ate it. Who am i?!
-Jenny

Pee Pee Pants

My turn... I peed myself last summer while walking down a very busy street in a rather large city. I HAD to tell the girls I was with because I needed *someone* to check and see if it was noticable - and NO I hadn't been drinking - no excuse at all.... they swore no one could tell - however.... I'm not sure I believe them. - Love Ruby

Little Hemi

Like for example, I have a hemaroid, and I've named it Hemi. And my husband teases me, saying to me "Does that thing have a Hemi?" and I giggle. Yes, this is funny to us. lol
-Jenny

We're "Jenny and Ruby"

(Not us. Photo taken by Giuseppe Lettieri)

Hi. Welcome to our blog. We met online and we talk everyday. We live across the Continent from each other, and so we feel the freedom to talk quite openly....because we won't see each other at the Walmart. (yes, we say that often) Jenny and Ruby aren't our real names. We are 2 woman who here, talk like men. Lol.

Enjoy our blog and use the comments section to declare your own *things* you don't tell real people... men and women welcome. Make yourself a fake name and post away.

If you have pictures you want us to post, email them to JennyandRuby@gmail.com :)

Link us in your blogs and spread the word. JennyandRuby.blogspot.com